What part of K.I.S.S can’t the NHS understand?     

NHS uses sledgehammers to crack nuts

Coming up with new ‘initiatives’ at regular intervals.  Wasting staff time, worrying patients and costing money to plan and set up.  Currently the NHS is in a flap about latest:  STPs or Sustainability and Transformation Plans.  

  • guaranteed to cost money – a lot – which the NHS hasn’t got
  • will be forgotten when NHS England comes up with the next plan.  After all, there are thouandsands of staff working there who must be kept busy
  • Sometimes, it’s the simplest ideas that are best

All the great and good were gathered around the hospital Boardroom Table.  Agenda item was “evaluating food quality – what do patients like to eat?”

Half an hour of verbiage – no solution – but meeting was veering towards approving an expensive firm of Management Consultants to come in and do a report.  Until …..someone suggested everyone just take one lunch break to stand around ward slop pails, and see which food items make up majority of discards from patients’ trays..  And have a look through all the letters of complaint piling up.

taff working there This didn’t go down very well, so item was carried over to next meeting – presumably hoping patient reps ( who liked KISS)  would have become bored and not turn up.  And then hospital management could appoint their favourite team of expensive Consultants, and wouldn’t have to waste a lunch hour themselves.

After all, it wasn’t their money that would go to pay for Management Consultants.
Care Quality Commission (CQC)

(sometimes known as the Cynical Commissioning Board)

The CQC is yet another NHS quango that doesn’t understand KISS.  Set up to oversee standards and quality in the NHS, their budget last year to ‘advise’ on standards was £211 million…… Humph…..

Discussing this quango on  nhsmanagers.net

Roy Lilley says  “There’s not much that surprises me but this takes the biscuit!  The CQC, are advertising a £1.2m contract to start a Leadership Development Programme:. ‘Managing and Leading the CQC Way’.

Any Business Manager can point to umpteen ‘Leadership Development Programmes’ offered by respected institutions – but no, the NHS has to waste our money developing their own – very expensively.

Expect it to include modules on the CQC Way of making hotel and charabanc companies rich, planning and shipping armies of ‘inspectors’ around the NHS.  And how to offer freebies to exotic locations, without the local press finding out?

Matron would have sorted this out during her tea break     .Image result for matron hattie jacques

Please NHS, remember KISS – ook at patients’ complaints.  Very inexpensive, doesn’t cost a penny in Market Research, and you might learn and save at the same time.

One of the most successful Hotel owners I knew said Letters of Complaint were the cheapest form of Market Research;  they told him what was wrong, and where, and often suggested a better way to do something – and didn’t cost him a penny.

But then, if the NHS adopted this idea – what would happen to CQCs?


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